Divorce Myths...

Seeing as how my blog discusses everything associated with divorce, I thought I would give people a heads up on the many myths of divorce. According to A publication of the National Marriage Project and Discovery Health there are ten myths of divorce, however, I will only be discussing what I believe to be the five biggest myths. (Image Source) The number one myth about divorce is "because people learn from their bad experiences, second marriages tend to be more successful than first marriages". Apparently, the divorce rate of remarriages is higher than that of first marriages. Another big myth (which I actually thought was true) is "living together before marriage is a good way to reduce the chances of eventually divorcing". A number of studies have found that those who live together before marriage have a higher chance of divorcing, yet the reasons are not well known. I hope that anyone reading this blog pays close attention to the next myth, "having a child together will help a couple to improve their marital satisfaction and prevent a divorce". NO NO NO the last thing you want to do is bring a child into the world when your marriage is heading towards divorce. According to Discovery Health "many studies have shown that the most stressful time in a marriage is after the first child is born". The fourth biggest myth to me and number six on the list is, "when parents don't get along, children are better off if their parents divorce than if they stay together". Discovery Health states "A recent large-scale, long-term study suggests otherwise. While it found that parents' marital unhappiness and discord have a broad negative impact on virtually every dimension of their children's well-being, so does the fact of going through a divorce. In examining the negative impacts on children more closely, the study discovered that it was only the children in very high-conflict homes who benefited from the conflict removal that divorce may bring.". The number ten myth and the last big myth on my list is, "It is usually men who initiate divorce proceedings", as I've written in my previous blog on How to Cope with Divorce, women initiate two thirds of divorce. To read the other myths not discussed here, visit Discovery Health or The National Marriage Project.

While looking into the different divorce myths I came across some other interesting myths that I would like to share. Divorce Source has an article on the "seven myths of divorce" some of which I found interesting, Myth 3- "Women bitterly regret divorce", not true. Most divorced women do not regret divorcing. Moreover, divorced women are generally happier than divorced men. And one large study suggests that many middle-aged women become happier after their divorce. These women showed an increase in positive self-image and self-esteem and were inspired by their divorce to gain more control of their lives. Myth 4 was a myth I have often wondered about "Women emerge from divorce more emotionally scarred and psychologically damaged than do men", according to divorce source, not only are divorced women happier than divorced men, but they are better off emotionally too. This myth was so interesting to me that I will dedicate a post to life after divorce looking at both men and women.

Many times people spread around information that they've heard thinking its fact when in actuality its just a myth. I always think its a smart thing to know everything possible about a situation, so for example if you're considering living with your partner before marriage thinking it will pevent divorce, now you know there are studies out there that prove otherwise. Not to say you shouldn't do it if thats what you want, but hopefully you'll do it now being more aware of what the outcome might be. (Image Source)